What if the Muni Metro lines took personality tests?
Why? Because they need it. And because they’ve been through it. And because it was something to do while we were waiting for them.
Here at Sutro Circuit, we believe public transit has a soul. So, ridiculously, we administered an extremely unscientific Myers-Briggs assessment to each of the Muni Metro lines — E, F, J, K, L, M, N, S, and T. The results were, honestly, a little too real.
🚎 E-Embarcadero — ISFP (“The Adventurer”)
Photogenic. Elusive. Moist.
May not be fast, and looks great doing it.
Available for weekends and long weekends only.
🌈 F-Market & Wharves — ENFP (“The Campaigner”)
Loud. Retro. Emotionally unhinged.
Has absolutely no chill. Follows absolutely zero schedule.
The line you think you love. Then it ghosts you.
🧘 J-Church — INFJ (“The Advocate”)
Quiet. Centered. And, y’know, kinda deep.
Left the chaos of downtown for something more meaningful (pronounced: Dolores).
Practices mindfulness in the Mission. Quietly weeps in Noe.
🧙♂️ K-Ingleside — INTP (“The Logician”)
Smart. Subtle. Frequently misidentified.
Has theories about transit equity and a secret Reddit account.
You don’t get it! And you don’t even try!
💁♀️ L-Taraval — ISTJ (“The Logistician”)
No-nonsense. Always packs a poncho and keeps every receipt.
Do not bring up the bus shuttle phase. Does not want to talk about it.
Now owns a clipboard. No longer trusts the process.
🎓 M-Ocean View — ESFJ (“The Consul”)
Helpful. Friendly. About to have a breakdown.
Waves at every pedestrian like they’re old coworkers.
Desperately needs a nap and union representation.
📸 N-Judah — ENTJ (“The Commander”)
Efficient. Popular. Overbooked.
It knows that you know that it knows that it’s the main character… and it likes it that way.
Judges you for your transfer strategy.
🦇 S-Shuttle — ISFJ (“The Defender”)
Quiet. Loyal. Doing 80% of the work.
Only appears when there’s a problem. Then disappears, without a trace, before the problem is solved.
Wonders why it keeps getting these chicken shit gigs.
⚡ T-Third — ENTP (“The Debater”)
Bold. Intellectual. Inexhaustible.
Full of vision and rebranding energy.
Has ideas. Has so many ideas.
At the end of the day, all the Muni lines are just trying to get us where we’re going — some with flair, some with feelings, and some with inconsistent hygiene practices.
They’re ours for better and for worse. So shoutout to our city’s most emotionally complex infrastructure. We see you. We validate you. We’re probably still waiting for you.